Transfer Talk: Robin van Persie

It seems that summer happened and everything else comes to a stand still - especially around here. First and foremost we'd like to apologise for the lack of activity on the Colney Chic. There has been a massive amount of travelling in my part, and a lot of Lia things and shenanigans in hers. (You can ask the details of that to her yourself). Euros came and gone, and so did the Olympics. Now here we are closing in to the end of summer and the start of another football season. 

The months between the seasons are often gruelling, but fear not - transfer rumours will relentlessly keep you company whether you like it or not. As expected, one player will sickeningly dominate the transfer activities during the break. Arsenal seems to be quite good at providing said players (see: Cesc Fabregas, Samir Nasri) so why should this year be any different? This summer, we witnessed the classic will-he-won't-he saga provided by the Arsenal frontman and (now ex) Captain, Robin van Persie. 

I have an unhealthy relationship with Robin van Persie. And by relationship, I mean obsession. And by obsession, I mean a sickness. He was plastered on my walls, downloaded to my laptops, and on my lips 24/7 for the past 5 years. Maybe it was the amount of time I spent talking about him to the point of nausea that helped me cope through this summer or maybe it was the fact that I just couldn't care less anymore. Ever since he released that bordering on megalomania statement, I knew I wanted him to pack his shit, give back the keys, and out the door. 

In the words of Whitney Houston: it's not right, but it's okay. 

Now I'm not the football fan blessed with the talent to write a witty thought-provoking article with tactics thrown around like it's Jaeger on a Saturday night, but I'll attempt and give my two cents in the best way I know how. I tend to liken a player's stay at a certain club to a relationship. Many football fans do use this allegory, though I like to think I take it further and better. The Cesc case is easy - he was still head over heels with his first love whose relationship he had ended prematurely, being young. The Samir case was a regrettable one night stand, and Henry's is the 'we know we're each other's love life even if we're not together'.

Robin is the one you waited for so long to be good to you. Robin is the one you loyally stood by while he went out to prove himself a man. Robin is the one who showed you off to his friends and made you sure he was yours. Robin is the one who endlessly hinted a proposal. The one whose closet you dare ransack to prove there's a ring only to realise, he's nothing more than the one that could have been. A dream. A postcard promise. A lie. A disappointment. A waste of time. 

Like the rest of them he leaves you for the neighbourhood whore - famous for all the wrong things. 

These two looks are created inspired by the philosophy of the two reds Robin van Persie has painted his career in. We attempt to embody the spirit of both Arsenal and MU in the context of the transfer through both outfits. The Arsenal look is unique, fashion-forward, and a little on the quirky side. We chose a draped silk dress with a twisted bust that spits out fabric to the knees, calf-hair pumps, and wooden box clutch with a matryoshka as a charming accent. The Man U look is strong, time-tested, and in your face. A rouched snake-skin print lacy dress showing skin in all the desired places, strappy sandals, and a solid black clutch completes the man-catcher look. 

Dress (Arsenal), Prabal Gurung, £789.25

Shoes (Arsenal), Alexandre Birman, £345

Clutch (Arsenal), Charlotte Olympia, £480

Dress (MU), Roberto Cavalli, £1690

Shoes (MU), Rupert Sanderson, £543

Clutch (MU), Bottega Veneta, £1125

Team Togs: Hertha BSC

Back again to the Bundesliga! This time we’ve headed over to the German capital and are bringing you an outfit inspired by Hertha Berlin. Although some of the first things that may come to mind about Berlin may be the Berlin airlift, the fall of the Berlin Wall and reunification of Germany, or JFK’s iconic “Ich bin ein Berliner” gaffe to name just a few iconic events, we’ve forgone the rich history of the city in favour of the equally action-packed history of the club.

Hertha were an inaugural member of the Bundesliga back in 1963 but the decade following was less than memorable, wrought by a bribery scandal that resulted in relegation and being several million euros in debt. The 70s brought a fair amount of success (bar a match fixing scandal) but more than half of the next 20 years were spent in the II. Bundesliga. Fast forward through some more debt and countless ups and downs and you've got a pretty good summary of the past 60 years for Berlin's favourite football team.

After reading the quick sparknotes version of Hertha’s recent history and still keeping in mind their origin of being named after a steamship by one of the founding members of BFC Hertha 92, we just couldn’t resist creating a slightly insane look with sailor-inspired elements. Think of it as something you could put together if someone put you in a shop after you've had a few beers.

There's no true centrepiece to this outfit, just individual elements that come together to create a whole. We've paired an anchor embellished pullover with nautical-striped pants, two strong sea-inspired elements but not quite overboard*. Add a bright blue bag and chained black trainers and we take the look up another notch. We accessorise with only a chunky seed bead bib, further enhancing the strong presence of blues in this outfit.

*Please don't sue us for any injuries inflicted from facepalming over our brilliant punnyness.


Pullover, L'Eclaireur, £78;
Bag, Givenchy, £1500;
Necklace, Charm & Chain, £60;
Trainers, ASOS, £113;
Pants, AX Paris, £30

Une Introduction

As a global sport, football is expected to cross all kinds of divides: be it gender, race, religion, sexual orientation, or even political stance. What a shame that the oldest and most prominent distinction remains to be between those who let it hang all about and they who prefer to keep it deep in the jungle. There is however an upside to every story and with the help of a little technology takeover in our modern society - female football fans who feel alienated amongst their testosterones counterparts are able to connect with other female fans all across the world who feel just the same.

But hey, aren't we getting overly PC here.

Here at The Colney Chic, we fully embrace our femininity as our greatest weapon in a world full of beer-bellied, sailor-swearing, lager-lugging, pie-porking and last-season's-jersey-that's-two-sizes-too-tight men. We take dressing to games seriously and believe that female-marketed merchandising (pink and white Arsenal scarves, anyone?) is empowering in a male-dominated world. Call it capitalism - we like to call it female emancipation with a price tag.

We highly regard male footballer objectification, because that's all they are good for. We're quite sure if we had to hold down a conversation with any of them - we'd steer the conversation to a possibility of playing Russian roulette.

The footballing world is our Colosseum and we are Rome's elite - giving approval to those who are worthy of a magazine spread and those who seriously could use a trip to the barber. Of course we're no shallow sheilas and we are fully aware that football is a serious sport. Serious. As serious as booze. And shoes. Or both.

To come back, we really are average girls who are simply passionate about football and fashion. So what better way to find our niche online? If rule 34 is true, then we declare that if we posts enough photos of naked footballers and designer dresses we will have followers. Hell, it worked for Kickette.

And oh, we are both Arsenal fans. All additional self-hate, delusions, over-optimism, and potential bi-polarism included.

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If you have managed to read this far without getting offended then do watch this space. This is our temporary trial blog and we concentrate in fashion blogging with a football basis (match days, finals, special ocassions). We also do regular opinions and commentaries post and a hoard of other knick knacks centred around the beautiful game.

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